Tuesdays.....and True Friends...

I've learned over the past three months that I do not like Tuesdays. There probably the worst day of the week for me. It's the day I get the most homework, and it's the day where everything seems to go wrong. It's also the day where I get to find out how the rest of my week goes. So far this week does not look promising.
I wanted to blog about friends and true friends. Being that this is my last year of high school I guess you could say that I'm finally getting to see who my true friends are. You know those real friends who will stand by you no matter what. Those few friends who no matter what you do will never think less of you. And sadly I'm finding that I only have two so far. Sad...
Alley and Paris are the only two true friends I seem to have as of now. Alley is the funniest girl I have ever known. She's the only person I know that loves movies as much as I do. We seem to be on the same brain wave most of the time and thats cool. Paris is such a sweetheart. She wouldnt hurt a fly. She has a life like mine although she deserves much better. She understands my morals and values and can see life like I see it for the most part.
I'm still trying to figure out Abby. We can be silly together and she can make me laugh even when I dont want to. But a part of her has a bad temper and she can be rude and extremely selfish. I dont think I could ever talk to her about my problems.
Leigh is another one of my friends that I am still trying to figure out. We've been friends since the 6th grade but she keeps changing. She lives with her boyfriend and works all the time. I only get to see her once a week. I just dont think were the same people we were in the 6th grade. I hope we dont grow apart but it seems that that is what we are doing.
I just wish I had someone I could tell. My secret is starting to control me and thats not what I intended. I'm the one who is supposed to be in control. My secret makes me in control...right? I feel as if I have to tell someone but I'm not sure if I ever will. I just wish I had a friend that could tell something was wrong. A friend that would ask me if I was okay. Thats all I want is for someone to care. But...yet I remain alone. Desperately and entirely alone....